








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1832 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 532 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 119 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4811 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,774 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1885 | 15% |
| Smokes | 3349 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3956 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3584 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,823,011 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1210 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w | 62% | 61 |
| #2 | TheTrillyG | 57% | 40 |
| #3 | xX_ClutchKing_Xx | 53% | 45 |
| #4 | xternal | 49% | 57 |
| #5 | TONY | 47% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w | 62% | 61 |
| #2 | TheTrillyG | 57% | 40 |
| #3 | xX_ClutchKing_Xx | 53% | 45 |
| #4 | xternal | 49% | 57 |
| #5 | TONY | 47% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheTrillyG | 7 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | w | 6 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | TONY | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | xternal | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | xX_ClutchKing_Xx | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w | 186 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #2 | xternal | 172 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | xX_ClutchKing_Xx | 147 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | TONY | 113 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | TheTrillyG | 102 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TONY | +2.91 | 81 | 48 |
| #2 | TheTrillyG | +1.71 | 62 | 70 |
| #3 | xX_ClutchKing_Xx | +1.65 | 83 | 77 |
| #4 | w | +1.41 | 76 | 36 |
| #5 | matrixmarauder | -0.35 | 68 | 46 |





