










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 75 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank |
|---|
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
154 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13 | 45% |
| Smokes | 13 | 45% |
| HE Grenades | 3 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 0 | 0% |
Our logs show you have wasted $73,480 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Patrick Beverly | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Costanza | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | Azir Thomas | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | ROPEMAXX | 50% | 6 |
| #5 | Fat Ectomorph | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Azir Thomas | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | ROPEMAXX | 50% | 6 |
| #5 | Fat Ectomorph | 0% | 3 |
| #6 | ✪ Manian | 0% | 3 |
| #7 | MR CLEN | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Azir Thomas | 2 | 0.0177 |
| #2 | ✪ Manian | 1 | 0.0164 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ROPEMAXX | 22 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #2 | Azir Thomas | 9 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #3 | ✪ Manian | 7 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | Fat Ectomorph | 5 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | Patrick Beverly | 4 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Costanza | +0.58 | 59 | 56 |
| #2 | ROPEMAXX | -1.04 | 33 | 26 |
| #3 | Patrick Beverly | -1.16 | 5 | 57 |
| #4 | ProZD Fan | -1.81 | 59 | 12 |
| #5 | Azir Thomas | -2.43 | 15 | 40 |





