








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 480 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 210 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2684 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,478 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2999 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2834 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2205 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2440 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $529,022 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 264 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Arburo♿ | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | 𒆜NⱥvⱥℝooŇey𒆜 | 52% | 50 |
| #3 | Burger King Bibbler | 51% | 188 |
| #4 | AGELIUS | 49% | 102 |
| #5 | Waltito | 43% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Arburo♿ | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | 𒆜NⱥvⱥℝooŇey𒆜 | 52% | 50 |
| #3 | Burger King Bibbler | 51% | 188 |
| #4 | AGELIUS | 49% | 102 |
| #5 | Waltito | 43% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Burger King Bibbler | 33 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | 𒆜NⱥvⱥℝooŇey𒆜 | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | AGELIUS | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Burger King Bibbler | 869 | 0.22 | 28 min |
| #2 | 𒆜NⱥvⱥℝooŇey𒆜 | 109 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Waltito | 70 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | AGELIUS | 45 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | Arburo♿ | 11 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Burger King Bibbler | +1.30 | 76 | 73 |
| #2 | AGELIUS | +0.86 | 84 | 36 |
| #3 | 𒆜NⱥvⱥℝooŇey𒆜 | +0.43 | 59 | 49 |
| #4 | farbror Göran | +0.08 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | Waltito | -4.34 | 57 | 71 |





