








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 275 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 262 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2100 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,206 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2405 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2788 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1984 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2029 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,179,628 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 142 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sorry for orange | 53% | 167 |
| #2 | sköjjejöjje | 50% | 34 |
| #3 | Sir. Big Gus | 49% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sorry for orange | 53% | 167 |
| #2 | sköjjejöjje | 50% | 34 |
| #3 | Sir. Big Gus | 49% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sir. Big Gus | 16 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | Sorry for orange | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | sköjjejöjje | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sir. Big Gus | 316 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #2 | Sorry for orange | 288 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #3 | sköjjejöjje | 42 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sorry for orange | +1.50 | 73 | 55 |
| #2 | Sorry4mahbadEngland | +0.28 | 56 | 57 |
| #3 | Sir. Big Gus | -1.05 | 63 | 63 |
| #4 | sköjjejöjje | -3.29 | 35 | 49 |





