








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 63 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
657 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,571 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1961 | 35% |
| Smokes | 869 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1572 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1169 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $410,706 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LOLOOOOOOOOO | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | hqx_x | 79% | 14 |
| #3 | y4nnisss | 70% | 20 |
| #4 | MonSter | 67% | 27 |
| #5 | PouneY 🐴 | 58% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hqx_x | 4 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | MonSter | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | .M0wgli | 3 | 0.0083 |
| #4 | BlazZ'D* | 3 | 0.0099 |
| #5 | y4nnisss | 2 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BlazZ'D* | 110 | 0.36 | 3 min |
| #2 | .M0wgli | 89 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #3 | MonSter | 84 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | PouneY 🐴 | 69 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | hqx_x | 28 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hqx_x | +6.43 | 95 | 44 |
| #2 | MonSter | +5.93 | 88 | 72 |
| #3 | PouneY 🐴 | +3.27 | 78 | 69 |
| #4 | BlazZ'D* | +3.25 | 73 | 63 |
| #5 | .M0wgli | +3.12 | 78 | 69 |





