








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
497 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 771 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 153 | 20% |
| Smokes | 91 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 403 | 52% |
| Molotovs | 124 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $133,357 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | σ ‘σ ‘ | 31 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #2 | Alex | 14 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #3 | Benny | 13 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | Pandaaa | 8 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | k0vac | 6 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k0vac | +6.85 | 78 | 47 |
| #2 | Rickzian: | +4.00 | 84 | 52 |
| #3 | I Kill Cuz I'm Hungry | +1.05 | 74 | 48 |
| #4 | Benny | +0.77 | 59 | 47 |
| #5 | Alex | +0.73 | 68 | 31 |





