








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 558 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 156 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 140 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2735 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,599 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2366 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3420 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3982 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1831 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $468,652 of utility $57 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 200 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saskia | 53% | 123 |
| #2 | Moky | 52% | 175 |
| #3 | ZAQA | 50% | 181 |
| #4 | Profesorko | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | blkkbh | 49% | 229 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moky | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | blkkbh | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | ZAQA | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Saskia | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Profesorko | 3 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZAQA | 430 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #2 | blkkbh | 418 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #3 | Saskia | 269 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Moky | 201 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #5 | Domper | 116 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Profesorko | +3.47 | 83 | 71 |
| #2 | blkkbh | +2.76 | 66 | 58 |
| #3 | Domper | +2.05 | 33 | 76 |
| #4 | ZAQA | +0.87 | 50 | 61 |
| #5 | RoZvodovod | -0.24 | 39 | 53 |





