








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 233 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 167 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1839 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,775 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1587 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1553 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1884 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1751 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $749,569 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alucard | 66% | 76 |
| #2 | Menderspai | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | lightning | 58% | 196 |
| #4 | spaceboi | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alucard | 66% | 76 |
| #2 | Menderspai | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | lightning | 58% | 196 |
| #4 | spaceboi | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alucard | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Menderspai | 4 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | lightning | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lightning | 139 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #2 | Alucard | 23 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| #3 | Menderspai | 22 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | spaceboi | 17 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sztaksel | +4.55 | 56 | 55 |
| #2 | lightning | +0.05 | 53 | 54 |
| #3 | Menderspai | -1.86 | 21 | 42 |
| #4 | spaceboi | -2.06 | 48 | 52 |
| #5 | Alucard | -4.56 | 30 | 20 |





