








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
353 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 787 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 131 | 17% |
| Smokes | 279 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 226 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 151 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $177,956 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mediocrejonni | +4.60 | 81 | 35 |
| #2 | POOL'S CLOSED! | +2.82 | 59 | 62 |
| #3 | Bon Clay | +2.34 | 70 | 66 |
| #4 | jud | +0.25 | 62 | 52 |
| #5 | Gray | +0.01 | 79 | 52 |





