








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1616 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 652 matches | ||
| Faceit | 166 matches | ||
| Wingman | 134 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




77 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9108 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,101 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5720 | 25% |
| Smokes | 8168 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 7232 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1981 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,493,399 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2680 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mattness | 58% | 123 |
| #2 | N0x1. | 57% | 272 |
| #3 | Carlul_ | 55% | 103 |
| #4 | Annegret | 51% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mattness | 58% | 123 |
| #2 | N0x1. | 57% | 272 |
| #3 | Carlul_ | 55% | 103 |
| #4 | Annegret | 51% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N0x1. | 13 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | mattness | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Carlul_ | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N0x1. | 698 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #2 | Carlul_ | 294 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #3 | mattness | 213 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | Annegret | 60 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xena | +1.02 | 68 | 50 |
| #2 | N0x1. | +0.62 | 72 | 61 |
| #3 | mattness | -0.10 | 57 | 45 |
| #4 | Annegret | -0.78 | 21 | 50 |
| #5 | Carlul_ | -1.93 | 64 | 52 |





