








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 15 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
417 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,707 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 682 | 40% |
| Smokes | 414 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 352 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 259 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $51,055 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BOOMER FORESTMAN | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Haverc | 60% | 30 |
| #3 | schelen | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Neo | 57% | 23 |
| #5 | MannDerExtreme | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pock | +7.64 | 70 | 45 |
| #2 | km | +2.63 | 76 | 63 |
| #3 | schelen | +2.40 | 63 | 62 |
| #4 | Haverc | +2.07 | 73 | 39 |
| #5 | Jag | +0.81 | 83 | 34 |





