








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2258 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,389 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1907 | 30% |
| Smokes | 980 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 1418 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2084 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $479,678 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 100 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SSMMIIIIIILLEE | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | chud(jak) | 65% | 20 |
| #3 | m0rphy | 64% | 28 |
| #4 | Frog | 58% | 43 |
| #5 | Black s1mple | 57% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | abra | 25 | 0.0112 |
| #2 | Black s1mple | 16 | 0.0109 |
| #3 | monkey blue | 10 | 0.0190 |
| #4 | Frog | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | m0rphy | 3 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | abra | 271 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | Black s1mple | 79 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | m0rphy | 57 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Frog | 27 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | monkey blue | 25 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | abra | +3.25 | 74 | 53 |
| #2 | m0rphy | +2.64 | 77 | 51 |
| #3 | Black s1mple | +2.43 | 81 | 31 |
| #4 | Frog | +1.10 | 58 | 39 |
| #5 | Tyler | +0.49 | 66 | 57 |





