








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 305 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 315 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1867 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,525 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 243 | 5% |
| Smokes | 346 | 8% |
| HE Grenades | 2196 | 49% |
| Molotovs | 1740 | 38% |
Our logs show you have wasted $398,207 of utility $50 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 141 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Murphy | 41% | 22 |
| #5 | Jack | 41% | 332 |
| #6 | Vinstage | 35% | 23 |
| #7 | Dess | 34% | 147 |
| #8 | :. Ĵ ų b ỳ - | 32% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jack | 793 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #2 | Dess | 520 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #3 | dmtr ♡ | 164 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | :. Ĵ ų b ỳ - | 98 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | Bruc3 | 71 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :. Ĵ ų b ỳ - | +4.64 | 63 | 46 |
| #2 | Bruc3 | +2.23 | 33 | 47 |
| #3 | Dess | +1.01 | 21 | 55 |
| #4 | Jack | +0.20 | 27 | 61 |
| #5 | Vinstage | -0.66 | 42 | 55 |





