








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
909 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,424 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 586 | 41% |
| Smokes | 318 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 247 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 273 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $115,482 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slash | 96% | 27 |
| #2 | odii | 89% | 19 |
| #3 | DEADSHOT | 83% | 12 |
| #4 | slitherz | 73% | 33 |
| #5 | Wildheart | 69% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slash | 96% | 27 |
| #2 | odii | 89% | 19 |
| #3 | DEADSHOT | 83% | 12 |
| #4 | slitherz | 73% | 33 |
| #5 | Wildheart | 69% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wildheart | 6 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | slitherz | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | slash | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slash | 109 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #2 | Wildheart | 98 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #3 | slitherz | 46 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | DEADSHOT | 33 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | odii | 18 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slash | +6.05 | 88 | 69 |
| #2 | White Fang | +4.34 | 87 | 52 |
| #3 | DEADSHOT | +2.04 | 91 | 48 |
| #4 | Wildheart | -0.02 | 84 | 48 |
| #5 | slitherz | -0.21 | 87 | 44 |





