








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 313 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 129 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1463 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,172 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2218 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1712 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2145 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1097 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $754,111 of utility $198 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 193 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DasRinger | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | Bubasnasty | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | ElLegio | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | aNoodleyApndage | 50% | 46 |
| #5 | Thurny007 | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ElLegio | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | aNoodleyApndage | 50% | 46 |
| #5 | Thurny007 | 45% | 11 |
| #6 | yuG | 41% | 27 |
| #7 | Erodent | 20% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DasRinger | 2 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | ElLegio | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Bubasnasty | 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ElLegio | 71 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | aNoodleyApndage | 32 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | yuG | 23 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | DasRinger | 17 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | Thurny007 | 12 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DasRinger | +8.71 | 89 | 69 |
| #2 | ElLegio | +6.41 | 84 | 76 |
| #3 | Myxxi | -0.02 | 63 | 69 |
| #4 | aNoodleyApndage | -1.17 | 38 | 57 |
| #5 | Bubasnasty | -1.67 | 34 | 33 |





