








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 341 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 510 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5464 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,208 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3492 | 38% |
| Smokes | 555 | 6% |
| HE Grenades | 2536 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2625 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $555,674 of utility $46 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 950 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FkN | Ninja | 61% | 46 |
| #2 | THE ENLARGER | 49% | 39 |
| #3 | effcici | 41% | 93 |
| #4 | Sleepy | 39% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FkN | Ninja | 61% | 46 |
| #2 | THE ENLARGER | 49% | 39 |
| #3 | effcici | 41% | 93 |
| #4 | Sleepy | 39% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | effcici | 24 | 0.0127 |
| #2 | Sleepy | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | THE ENLARGER | 3 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | effcici | 211 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #2 | Sleepy | 56 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | FkN | Ninja | 10 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #4 | THE ENLARGER | 2 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THE ENLARGER | +2.46 | 64 | 6 |
| #2 | TinaTheFatLard | +1.39 | 61 | 37 |
| #3 | FkN | Ninja | -0.14 | 74 | 18 |
| #4 | effcici | -0.75 | 45 | 45 |
| #5 | Sleepy | -4.73 | 24 | 25 |





