








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 212 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 138 matches | ||
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2519 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,924 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2662 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3261 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2074 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1927 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,021,679 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 115 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomzyka | 68% | 28 |
| #2 | Sch1linski | 64% | 33 |
| #3 | Vali M. | 62% | 53 |
| #4 | Darwin | 59% | 51 |
| #5 | mathan | 56% | 126 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mathan | 10 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Krekon | 10 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Vali M. | 5 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | Darwin | 5 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | Ne[X]t | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mathan | 682 | 0.25 | 18 min |
| #2 | Krekon | 346 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | tomzyka | 163 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #4 | Darwin | 120 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Lennox-C- | 105 | 0.32 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomzyka | +4.63 | 69 | 75 |
| #2 | mathan | +1.45 | 79 | 68 |
| #3 | Sch1linski | +1.29 | 51 | 59 |
| #4 | Lord Hazelnut III. | +1.14 | 67 | 64 |
| #5 | Krekon | +0.43 | 54 | 62 |





