








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1952 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Italy | 612 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 322 matches | ||
| Premier | 144 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 65 matches | ||
| Wingman | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 456 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




121 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14830 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 39,701 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6449 | 16% |
| Smokes | 11508 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 8264 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 13480 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,679,314 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5570 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | BartosPeek | 67% | 73 |
| #9 | Kotrevák Kelly | 67% | 379 |
| #10 | ReFReSHeR | 62% | 199 |
| #11 | EmeraldWillBe | 61% | 338 |
| #12 | Cunga 垃 圾 | 52% | 85 |





