








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 177 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 395 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 88 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4413 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,466 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4577 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6258 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3738 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 4893 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $978,488 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XxMeemilfTheAnalBeadX9000xX | 55% | 152 |
| #2 | modern trickster boy | 53% | 394 |
| #3 | -yungSackYapper | 52% | 63 |
| #4 | Mattu | 50% | 38 |
| #5 | Goatse_Kuronen | 49% | 235 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goopey (da menace) | +2.79 | 79 | 73 |
| #2 | modern trickster boy | +2.17 | 78 | 68 |
| #3 | Mattu | -0.99 | 60 | 14 |
| #4 | Goatse_Kuronen | -1.14 | 53 | 42 |
| #5 | XxMeemilfTheAnalBeadX9000xX | -1.61 | 48 | 32 |





