








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 779 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 340 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3941 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,068 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7159 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5917 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4419 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4573 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $729,736 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 526 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ✪ Mr. NickS | 54% | 108 |
| #4 | ✪ ThatGuy | 53% | 119 |
| #5 | PK24 | 51% | 203 |
| #6 | jim | 51% | 161 |
| #7 | ✪ Mr. ThierryH | 50% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jim | 11 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | PK24 | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Shootehr | 5 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | ✪ ThatGuy | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | ✪ Mr. ThierryH | 2 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PK24 | 277 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #2 | jim | 258 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | ✪ ThatGuy | 234 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | Shootehr | 189 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | ✪ Mr. NickS | 160 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jim | +1.09 | 71 | 60 |
| #2 | ✪ Mr. NickS | +0.77 | 61 | 57 |
| #3 | Shootehr | +0.57 | 70 | 65 |
| #4 | PK24 | +0.29 | 56 | 54 |
| #5 | ✪ ThatGuy | +0.13 | 61 | 60 |





