








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 364 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2272 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,755 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2159 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2285 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1947 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1364 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $744,924 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 273 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MikeOxonfire (Ricardo MilosFan) | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | Noname | 54% | 109 |
| #3 | rEXY | 53% | 144 |
| #4 | DON POLLO (C) | 52% | 31 |
| #5 | Lampos | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iRookie ! | 8 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | rEXY | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | DON POLLO (C) | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Noname | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | MikeOxonfire (Ricardo MilosFan) | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rEXY | 290 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | iRookie ! | 161 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Noname | 157 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | MikeOxonfire (Ricardo MilosFan) | 39 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | DON POLLO (C) | 31 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sonny | +2.63 | 72 | 64 |
| #2 | rEXY | +1.52 | 66 | 64 |
| #3 | Lampos | +1.16 | 85 | 50 |
| #4 | DON POLLO (C) | +0.62 | 52 | 44 |
| #5 | Noname | -1.00 | 51 | 46 |





