








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 551 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 172 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2267 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,011 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1704 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1443 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 893 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 971 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $713,959 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 420 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | No, no war, only rocket | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | JÆRN✫ | 61% | 31 |
| #3 | krantto | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | Tominator | 58% | 26 |
| #5 | ᴸˢ alex | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ᴸˢ alex | 55% | 29 |
| #6 | Frippe | 52% | 136 |
| #7 | bemari 6023543 | 52% | 73 |
| #8 | Raparänno | 48% | 44 |
| #9 | Krilleb. | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raparänno | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Frippe | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #3 | bemari 6023543 | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Krilleb. | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frippe | 842 | 0.29 | 25 min |
| #2 | bemari 6023543 | 260 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | krantto | 116 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #4 | JÆRN✫ | 88 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | Tominator | 85 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | don ditcho. | +2.42 | 83 | 57 |
| #2 | JÆRN✫ | +1.46 | 71 | 67 |
| #3 | krantto | +0.91 | 52 | 68 |
| #4 | Tominator | +0.25 | 71 | 63 |
| #5 | Krilleb. | +0.05 | 69 | 65 |





