








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
719 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,298 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 202 | 16% |
| Smokes | 414 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 383 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 299 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $237,509 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fish | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | newwave | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | THR | 57% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fish | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | newwave | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | THR | 57% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THR | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Fish | 2 | 0.0145 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THR | 155 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | newwave | 35 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | Fish | 9 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THR | +2.09 | 74 | 56 |
| #2 | Pimpy Son Opp | +1.13 | 62 | 49 |
| #3 | newwave | +1.02 | 70 | 57 |
| #4 | Fish | -0.88 | 38 | 47 |





