








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
320 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,033 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 155 | 15% |
| Smokes | 355 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 293 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 230 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $121,550 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheInsomnolent | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | Savage | 51% | 35 |
| #3 | Snake | 42% | 12 |
| #4 | Faust | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheInsomnolent | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | Savage | 51% | 35 |
| #3 | Snake | 42% | 12 |
| #4 | Faust | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Savage | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Savage | 104 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | Snake | 13 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #3 | TheInsomnolent | 11 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #4 | Faust | 6 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snake | +3.39 | 63 | 57 |
| #2 | Savage | -0.64 | 53 | 66 |
| #3 | Faust | -0.95 | 59 | 57 |
| #4 | ThunderFlare | -1.55 | 39 | 54 |
| #5 | TheInsomnolent | -4.51 | 23 | 38 |





