










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 327 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
592 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,609 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 276 | 17% |
| Smokes | 509 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 494 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 330 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $532,841 of utility $291 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Kodal v65 | 43% | 30 |
| #2 | Sidelæns dejmås | 40% | 30 |
| #3 | Dinesen | 38% | 63 |
| #4 | Shifu | 33% | 12 |
| #5 | Dinesen Jr. | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sidelæns dejmås | 3 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Dinesen | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Dinesen Jr. | 2 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | The Kodal v65 | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Shifu | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dinesen | 158 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #2 | The Kodal v65 | 72 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Sidelæns dejmås | 44 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Shifu | 22 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | Dinesen Jr. | 19 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sidelæns dejmås | +2.84 | 77 | 62 |
| #2 | Shifu | +1.01 | 78 | 54 |
| #3 | Dinesen | +0.60 | 68 | 58 |
| #4 | The Kodal v65 | -1.09 | 33 | 71 |
| #5 | YoungNEasy | -1.10 | 48 | 46 |





