








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 278 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2210 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,953 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1663 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2239 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1420 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1631 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $938,047 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 345 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SgtSquirt | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | benis | 60% | 30 |
| #3 | YungBalls | 59% | 66 |
| #4 | ✪ Shaff | 56% | 89 |
| #5 | Vibing Rn | 53% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | YungBalls | 59% | 66 |
| #4 | ✪ Shaff | 56% | 89 |
| #5 | Vibing Rn | 53% | 19 |
| #6 | Donald Trump | 51% | 85 |
| #7 | yes | 41% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donald Trump | 22 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | YungBalls | 22 | 0.0160 |
| #3 | yes | 10 | 0.0121 |
| #4 | benis | 8 | 0.0122 |
| #5 | Vibing Rn | 4 | 0.0093 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donald Trump | 209 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | YungBalls | 164 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | yes | 108 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | ✪ Shaff | 86 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | benis | 59 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vibing Rn | +4.82 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | benis | +3.58 | 79 | 58 |
| #3 | Donald Trump | +1.03 | 69 | 59 |
| #4 | ✪ Shaff | +0.75 | 55 | 34 |
| #5 | SgtSquirt | +0.25 | 49 | 29 |





