








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 513 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 758 matches | ||
| Faceit | 116 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 91 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7410 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 48,433 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10526 | 22% |
| Smokes | 12302 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 12454 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 13151 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,422,556 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1274 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Silence | 58% | 81 |
| #2 | T!wysta` | 57% | 106 |
| #3 | a | 52% | 62 |
| #4 | GrødRiis | 48% | 54 |
| #5 | Sayounara | 48% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | a | 52% | 62 |
| #4 | GrødRiis | 48% | 54 |
| #5 | Sayounara | 48% | 88 |
| #6 | DaHuanSoon | 42% | 111 |
| #7 | coRE | 42% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T!wysta` | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | a | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Sayounara | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Silence | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | coRE | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sayounara | 263 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #2 | T!wysta` | 235 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | DaHuanSoon | 217 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #4 | coRE | 193 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | GrødRiis | 175 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sayounara | +1.80 | 68 | 64 |
| #2 | GrødRiis | +0.76 | 62 | 76 |
| #3 | RealMagne | +0.73 | 69 | 72 |
| #4 | Silence | +0.56 | 45 | 68 |
| #5 | T!wysta` | -0.33 | 59 | 64 |





