








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 723 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 174 matches | ||
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4181 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,884 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6339 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5583 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4435 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4527 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $298,206 of utility $40 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 304 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kotson | 81% | 58 |
| #2 | ✞ Mimo ✞ | 79% | 66 |
| #3 | blbn | 78% | 91 |
| #4 | dexonovsky- | 77% | 93 |
| #5 | magISCO | 74% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | magISCO | 74% | 34 |
| #6 | TAZ Bałagane | 61% | 18 |
| #7 | SilverAim | 53% | 176 |
| #8 | BeeZy | 50% | 127 |
| #9 | Jason | 41% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SilverAim | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Jason | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | BeeZy | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | dexonovsky- | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | blbn | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dexonovsky- | 419 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #2 | BeeZy | 346 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #3 | SilverAim | 319 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #4 | blbn | 218 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | Kotson | 205 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dexonovsky- | +5.42 | 87 | 74 |
| #2 | BeeZy | +2.02 | 73 | 67 |
| #3 | TAZ Bałagane | +1.59 | 77 | 52 |
| #4 | bo. ♿ | +1.49 | 73 | 73 |
| #5 | blbn | +0.46 | 49 | 62 |





