








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 77 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 126 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1805 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,364 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1272 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1709 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1428 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1955 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $777,962 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 164 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | King Of The Jungle | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | RzR´ | 58% | 88 |
| #3 | Maddis Mark | 50% | 14 |
| #4 | HELLY™ | 50% | 18 |
| #5 | tees | 50% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | RzR´ | 58% | 88 |
| #3 | Maddis Mark | 50% | 14 |
| #4 | HELLY™ | 50% | 18 |
| #5 | tees | 50% | 50 |
| #6 | Thunderkoala | 49% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RzR´ | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Thunderkoala | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | tees | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | HELLY™ | 2 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | King Of The Jungle | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RzR´ | 684 | 0.38 | 18 min |
| #2 | tees | 180 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | Thunderkoala | 162 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | King Of The Jungle | 160 | 0.38 | 5 min |
| #5 | Maddis Mark | 43 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HELLY™ | +3.74 | 84 | 61 |
| #2 | tees | +3.45 | 91 | 62 |
| #3 | King Of The Jungle | +3.33 | 95 | 79 |
| #4 | RzR´ | +2.97 | 93 | 78 |
| #5 | Thunderkoala | -0.58 | 75 | 56 |





