








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 693 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 266 matches | ||
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 52 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5766 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,783 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7727 | 31% |
| Smokes | 6324 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4875 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 5857 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,749,420 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 278 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sgt. Zaphkiel | 56% | 32 |
| #2 | mestari | 56% | 246 |
| #3 | Limup0ju | 54% | 57 |
| #4 | niklas | 52% | 202 |
| #5 | miksukin | 52% | 225 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mestari | 827 | 0.16 | 25 min |
| #2 | S E M I H U M A L A | 656 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | miksukin | 355 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #4 | aivon mätä | 225 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #5 | SpeedyToppa | 213 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | niklas | +2.40 | 74 | 45 |
| #2 | Sgt. Zaphkiel | +2.25 | 73 | 66 |
| #3 | turboahtaaja | +2.16 | 64 | 74 |
| #4 | mestari | +0.57 | 60 | 76 |
| #5 | aivon mätä | +0.13 | 58 | 70 |





