








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 529 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 131 matches | ||
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2575 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,878 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2665 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3110 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3746 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3357 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,017,056 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ;Burst1 | 46% | 28 |
| #7 | KalakutanKorjaamo | 41% | 69 |
| #8 | sÜkeripupu:3 | 36% | 33 |
| #9 | JALLUN PIHTAAJA | 35% | 23 |
| #10 | biibelbrox | 25% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiCKi | 5 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | JOPPURA | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | sÜkeripupu:3 | 3 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KalakutanKorjaamo | 259 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | JOPPURA | 165 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | MiCKi | 124 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | ;Burst1 | 95 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | JALLUN PIHTAAJA | 41 | 0.08 | 1 min |





