








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 439 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1660 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,378 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1855 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4368 | 52% |
| HE Grenades | 644 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 1511 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $789,479 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 384 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Screweyes | 51% | 51 |
| #2 | qi7p1rc | cr1p7iq | 48% | 67 |
| #3 | Tyler Turden | 42% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Screweyes | 51% | 51 |
| #2 | qi7p1rc | cr1p7iq | 48% | 67 |
| #3 | Tyler Turden | 42% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Screweyes | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qi7p1rc | cr1p7iq | 174 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #2 | Screweyes | 112 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | Tyler Turden | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qi7p1rc | cr1p7iq | +1.19 | 46 | 56 |
| #2 | vono_97 | -0.09 | 27 | 47 |
| #3 | Tyler Turden | -1.92 | 1 | 62 |
| #4 | Screweyes | -4.88 | 25 | 45 |





