








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 582 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 292 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2321 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,165 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3889 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3920 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3080 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2276 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,404,180 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 309 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ankapoka | 55% | 114 |
| #2 | bumbbu^👽 | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | Foxö | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | Teuska | 46% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ankapoka | 55% | 114 |
| #2 | bumbbu^👽 | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | Foxö | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | Teuska | 46% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teuska | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | ankapoka | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | Foxö | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teuska | 340 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | ankapoka | 154 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #3 | bumbbu^👽 | 83 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Foxö | 50 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Foxö | +2.04 | 74 | 54 |
| #2 | Teuska | +1.81 | 59 | 67 |
| #3 | ankapoka | +0.44 | 59 | 59 |
| #4 | Rauhis | +0.41 | 68 | 72 |
| #5 | bumbbu^👽 | -1.30 | 55 | 69 |





