








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 42 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1264 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,036 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1520 | 19% |
| Smokes | 946 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 3320 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 2250 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $692,588 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRUCHTPanda | 56% | 18 |
| #2 | Raithe | 50% | 20 |
| #3 | 'JJ | 38% | 60 |
| #4 | Arnie | 25% | 20 |
| #5 | DirkEdelmann | 22% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRUCHTPanda | 56% | 18 |
| #2 | Raithe | 50% | 20 |
| #3 | 'JJ | 38% | 60 |
| #4 | Arnie | 25% | 20 |
| #5 | DirkEdelmann | 22% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 'JJ | 7 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | Arnie | 3 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | DirkEdelmann | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 'JJ | 173 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | Arnie | 25 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | Raithe | 25 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | FRUCHTPanda | 16 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | DirkEdelmann | 8 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 'JJ | +0.64 | 65 | 56 |
| #2 | Raithe | -0.02 | 75 | 44 |
| #3 | FRUCHTPanda | -1.61 | 38 | 54 |
| #4 | Johanny Edwin | -3.23 | 23 | 51 |
| #5 | DirkEdelmann | -4.90 | 15 | 35 |





