








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 275 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2177 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,788 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3348 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2942 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1895 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2603 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,135,722 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 238 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Papa Cereais | 55% | 20 |
| #2 | chapz | 55% | 80 |
| #3 | Pato Gostoso | 51% | 70 |
| #4 | Valente | 49% | 75 |
| #5 | Leite_de_creme | 47% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mijeimi Nakama | 11 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | chapz | 11 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | Melga Mike | 7 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Palhão | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Pato Gostoso | 5 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Palhão | 470 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #2 | Mijeimi Nakama | 463 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | Melga Mike | 313 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #4 | chapz | 290 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #5 | Pato Gostoso | 228 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chapz | +4.62 | 85 | 73 |
| #2 | Melga Mike | +4.43 | 81 | 66 |
| #3 | Valente | +3.09 | 69 | 65 |
| #4 | Pato Gostoso | +2.39 | 55 | 63 |
| #5 | ratelas | +1.12 | 48 | 64 |





