








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 959 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 432 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3792 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,436 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4180 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4450 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3444 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2362 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,824,669 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 243 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1amnorth | 48% | 29 |
| #2 | mufasa | 47% | 129 |
| #3 | M α 𝜏 𝜏 ℏ ε ω | 45% | 192 |
| #4 | Nate | 44% | 213 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1amnorth | 48% | 29 |
| #2 | mufasa | 47% | 129 |
| #3 | M α 𝜏 𝜏 ℏ ε ω | 45% | 192 |
| #4 | Nate | 44% | 213 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nate | 25 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | mufasa | 13 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | M α 𝜏 𝜏 ℏ ε ω | 12 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nate | 820 | 0.18 | 21 min |
| #2 | M α 𝜏 𝜏 ℏ ε ω | 648 | 0.16 | 20 min |
| #3 | mufasa | 393 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #4 | 1amnorth | 57 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M α 𝜏 𝜏 ℏ ε ω | +3.14 | 63 | 61 |
| #2 | mufasa | +1.53 | 68 | 59 |
| #3 | 1amnorth | +1.00 | 61 | 63 |
| #4 | Nate | +0.27 | 50 | 70 |
| #5 | NikoCousin | -1.46 | 34 | 55 |





