








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 234 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 220 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2591 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,426 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1749 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1817 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 371 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 1489 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,223,604 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 687 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | August | 56% | 48 |
| #2 | giga chad666 | 53% | 34 |
| #3 | Jazur | 52% | 31 |
| #4 | Willibam | 51% | 171 |
| #5 | /Steff3n/ | 47% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Jazur | 52% | 31 |
| #4 | Willibam | 51% | 171 |
| #5 | /Steff3n/ | 47% | 186 |
| #6 | ChrisT- | 44% | 32 |
| #7 | Jumbo | 39% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | /Steff3n/ | 10 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Jumbo | 7 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Willibam | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | ChrisT- | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | August | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Willibam | 479 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #2 | /Steff3n/ | 309 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #3 | Jazur | 110 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | Jumbo | 102 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | giga chad666 | 101 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Willibam | +1.89 | 78 | 68 |
| #2 | Tobiasnn2 | +0.72 | 64 | 44 |
| #3 | ChrisT- | +0.26 | 80 | 60 |
| #4 | Jazur | +0.06 | 50 | 74 |
| #5 | August | -0.82 | 66 | 61 |





