








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 267 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 241 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3445 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,636 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9249 | 43% |
| Smokes | 4382 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 4953 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3052 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $465,720 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Polo | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | MyFriends | 57% | 93 |
| #3 | "DINK" | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | BIGMANBENNY_ | 51% | 94 |
| #5 | MightBeDt | 50% | 221 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | MyFriends | 57% | 93 |
| #3 | "DINK" | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | BIGMANBENNY_ | 51% | 94 |
| #5 | MightBeDt | 50% | 221 |
| #6 | shwek | 47% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MightBeDt | 13 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | MyFriends | 7 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | BIGMANBENNY_ | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | "DINK" | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | shwek | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MightBeDt | 474 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #2 | MyFriends | 265 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | BIGMANBENNY_ | 216 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | Polo | 82 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | "DINK" | 70 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shwek | +2.27 | 68 | 67 |
| #2 | Polo | +1.87 | 52 | 68 |
| #3 | steveo23 | +1.56 | 58 | 77 |
| #4 | BIGMANBENNY_ | +1.02 | 56 | 59 |
| #5 | "DINK" | +0.39 | 55 | 45 |





