








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 55 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 220 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2210 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,827 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 392 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1161 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 834 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 440 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $232,502 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 45 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TonioS | 50% | 216 |
| #2 | Daniel | 47% | 112 |
| #3 | The Hot Banana | 46% | 127 |
| #4 | Nonnur | 44% | 165 |
| #5 | Jooms | 35% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Daniel | 47% | 112 |
| #3 | The Hot Banana | 46% | 127 |
| #4 | Nonnur | 44% | 165 |
| #5 | Jooms | 35% | 46 |
| #6 | XM | 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TonioS | 37 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | The Hot Banana | 13 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Jooms | 7 | 0.0067 |
| #4 | Nonnur | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | XM | 2 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TonioS | 525 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #2 | The Hot Banana | 301 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | Daniel | 138 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nonnur | 72 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | Jooms | 45 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XM | +1.18 | 49 | 51 |
| #2 | TonioS | +0.86 | 46 | 59 |
| #3 | God's Mistake | +0.78 | 70 | 34 |
| #4 | Nonnur | -0.48 | 61 | 45 |
| #5 | Jooms | -1.35 | 51 | 37 |





