










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 48 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 5 matches | 1,811 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
94 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 448 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 143 | 32% |
| Smokes | 122 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 84 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 99 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $31,505 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | haffad | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | ♠Jan-CoGo♠ | 67% | 3 |
| #5 | shoopdawhoop | 67% | 9 |
| #6 | puMz | 63% | 8 |
| #7 | Golf Rasslård | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haffad | 1 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Golf Rasslård | +4.76 | 85 | 52 |
| #2 | haffad | +2.02 | 81 | 73 |
| #3 | shoopdawhoop | +1.09 | 78 | 56 |
| #4 | sean | +0.45 | 77 | 80 |
| #5 | puMz | -0.62 | 63 | 69 |





