








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 891 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 452 matches | ||
| Faceit | 156 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9026 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,008 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10638 | 37% |
| Smokes | 6270 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 6473 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5627 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,557,546 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2191 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | suck my ass #teampositivity | 46 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | Ajoyfulpig | 38 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | Thrombosis Johnson (he/him) | 36 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Taco Taco Enchilada | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | jOHN | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drg | +1.81 | 64 | 55 |
| #2 | Ajoyfulpig | +1.64 | 81 | 58 |
| #3 | wonder | +1.00 | 85 | 66 |
| #4 | suck my ass #teampositivity | +0.15 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | jOHN | -0.23 | 79 | 54 |





