








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 746 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 417 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 155 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




91 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4269 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,981 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4266 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4982 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4413 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4320 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,543,443 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1757 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JagobaA7X | 71% | 38 |
| #2 | neixer | 71% | 31 |
| #3 | emotive | 63% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JagobaA7X | 71% | 38 |
| #2 | neixer | 71% | 31 |
| #3 | emotive | 63% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JagobaA7X | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | neixer | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emotive | 152 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | JagobaA7X | 82 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | neixer | 45 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JagobaA7X | +1.35 | 88 | 60 |
| #2 | FeRReRa8 | +1.08 | 72 | 64 |
| #3 | emotive | +0.35 | 78 | 72 |
| #4 | neixer | -0.17 | 78 | 70 |





