








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 368 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1417 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,960 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1469 | 25% |
| Smokes | 811 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 2410 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 1270 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $400,183 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 313 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MEKTIGTRUSLERMOITSTATEN | 21 | 0.0095 |
| #2 | Jackern | 12 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | kr3z | 11 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Demetrious Mocha Richard PEEK | 9 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | indiana BANE glans penis PEEK | 8 | 0.0127 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kr3z | 399 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #2 | MEKTIGTRUSLERMOITSTATEN | 383 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | Demetrious Mocha Richard PEEK | 173 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | indiana BANE glans penis PEEK | 129 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | paNda | 101 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Demetrious Mocha Richard PEEK | +3.07 | 70 | 53 |
| #2 | kr3z | +1.87 | 76 | 64 |
| #3 | SMOKING PEEK | +1.50 | 74 | 54 |
| #4 | paNda | -0.13 | 75 | 58 |
| #5 | MEKTIGTRUSLERMOITSTATEN | -0.54 | 66 | 52 |





