








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 350 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 207 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4504 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,609 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4904 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3117 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3892 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3696 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $791,833 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 148 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | *・゚☆ side* | 66% | 270 |
| #2 | jibeuji | 64% | 198 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | *・゚☆ side* | 66% | 270 |
| #2 | jibeuji | 64% | 198 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jibeuji | 14 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | *・゚☆ side* | 10 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | *・゚☆ side* | 1215 | 0.22 | 39 min |
| #2 | jibeuji | 106 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DuckJ | +4.70 | 77 | 75 |
| #2 | *・゚☆ side* | +2.71 | 80 | 78 |
| #3 | jibeuji | -3.94 | 50 | 26 |





