








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
877 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,102 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1139 | 37% |
| Smokes | 779 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 819 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 365 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $77,526 of utility $36 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | soBis` | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | Vyzha | 55% | 20 |
| #3 | Cavalieriuss | 45% | 11 |
| #4 | Ruokis3 | 45% | 22 |
| #5 | Awowogei | 45% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Ruokis3 | 45% | 22 |
| #5 | Awowogei | 45% | 49 |
| #6 | Liutke | 39% | 28 |
| #7 | RASAMAHA | 38% | 8 |
| #8 | Vegasas | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vyzha | 4 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | Awowogei | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Liutke | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Ruokis3 | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Cavalieriuss | 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | soBis` | 98 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | Awowogei | 67 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Ruokis3 | 58 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | Liutke | 41 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Vegasas | 22 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Awowogei | +1.64 | 75 | 58 |
| #2 | Cavalieriuss | +0.68 | 70 | 49 |
| #3 | Ak | +0.39 | 85 | 63 |
| #4 | soBis` | +0.09 | 68 | 83 |
| #5 | Ruokis3 | -1.32 | 48 | 73 |





