








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 56 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 25 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
604 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,886 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 257 | 14% |
| Smokes | 558 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 569 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 502 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $290,516 of utility $200 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pluton | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | sleib | 49% | 45 |
| #3 | Fosse | 46% | 69 |
| #4 | ExiZ | 45% | 47 |
| #5 | BuGGee | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ExiZ | 45% | 47 |
| #5 | BuGGee | 44% | 9 |
| #6 | Riska | 38% | 34 |
| #7 | Aateigen * eXclusive | 25% | 4 |
| #8 | Jesus! | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sleib | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | pluton | 2 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | BuGGee | 2 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | Fosse | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Riska | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fosse | 191 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #2 | sleib | 97 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | ExiZ | 74 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | pluton | 34 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Riska | 27 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sleib | +2.71 | 69 | 63 |
| #2 | Veppsn | +1.08 | 60 | 40 |
| #3 | Jesus! | +0.61 | 43 | 53 |
| #4 | pluton | -0.14 | 61 | 62 |
| #5 | BuGGee | -0.45 | 57 | 67 |





