








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 268 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 238 matches | ||
| Premier | 206 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3367 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,163 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1571 | 13% |
| Smokes | 4038 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3472 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3082 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,090,910 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 330 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamal | 55% | 147 |
| #2 | leev | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | Kaijan Gosling | 54% | 89 |
| #4 | Temmerr | 53% | 32 |
| #5 | Refy Huu | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamal | 55% | 147 |
| #2 | leev | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | Kaijan Gosling | 54% | 89 |
| #4 | Temmerr | 53% | 32 |
| #5 | Refy Huu | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamal | 20 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Kaijan Gosling | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | leev | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Refy Huu | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamal | 315 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | Kaijan Gosling | 205 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | leev | 167 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | Refy Huu | 79 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Temmerr | 58 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamal | +3.68 | 77 | 54 |
| #2 | leev | +1.78 | 70 | 67 |
| #3 | Temmerr | +0.65 | 85 | 59 |
| #4 | Nickster | +0.64 | 48 | 49 |
| #5 | Kaijan Gosling | +0.15 | 51 | 59 |





