








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 949 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 93 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5897 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,567 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5963 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5658 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3610 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 4336 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,454,789 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2608 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ^_^_^_^ | 57% | 228 |
| #2 | emovegan | 56% | 209 |
| #3 | Zinh | 52% | 313 |
| #4 | Frayawin | 51% | 114 |
| #5 | Black Air Force 1's | 50% | 310 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zinh | 1160 | 0.18 | 28 min |
| #2 | ^_^_^_^ | 773 | 0.17 | 22 min |
| #3 | emovegan | 613 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #4 | Black Air Force 1's | 542 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #5 | Ryduce | 231 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zeug1ni | +3.54 | 71 | 74 |
| #2 | ^_^_^_^ | +2.63 | 80 | 62 |
| #3 | Frayawin | +0.53 | 71 | 34 |
| #4 | Black Air Force 1's | +0.30 | 79 | 48 |
| #5 | Zinh | -0.26 | 56 | 63 |





