








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Wingman | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3896 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,007 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1650 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1613 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1027 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1717 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,203,246 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | olive | 54% | 24 |
| #2 | J. D. Vance | 48% | 27 |
| #3 | Bingsus_ | 46% | 166 |
| #4 | [Recruit_49] | 44% | 162 |
| #5 | Tanban | 42% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bingsus_ | 33 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | olive | 13 | 0.0283 |
| #3 | Nook's GothGirl | 12 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | [Recruit_49] | 12 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Tanban | 9 | 0.0073 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | olive | +3.47 | 62 | 32 |
| #2 | Tanban | +1.71 | 79 | 49 |
| #3 | Bingsus_ | +1.30 | 78 | 47 |
| #4 | Nook | +0.23 | 44 | 66 |
| #5 | Nook's GothGirl | -0.42 | 64 | 47 |





