








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 47 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1078 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,397 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2119 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1109 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1703 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1466 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $199,127 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝐑U𝐙𝐙K𝐈𝐙 | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Vili | 63% | 51 |
| #3 | Stook | 59% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝐑U𝐙𝐙K𝐈𝐙 | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Vili | 63% | 51 |
| #3 | Stook | 59% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vili | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Stook | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stook | 172 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #2 | Vili | 69 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | 𝐑U𝐙𝐙K𝐈𝐙 | 39 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vili | +1.62 | 60 | 56 |
| #2 | Stook | +1.52 | 68 | 60 |
| #3 | Rattopoika Banzi | +0.43 | 63 | 73 |
| #4 | 𝐑U𝐙𝐙K𝐈𝐙 | -1.14 | 37 | 72 |





